The picture you see here was taken 6 days after my beloved grandmother passed on. The insights, peace, clarity, gratitude and love moved through me with such beautiful intensity 💗- right after very deep grieving (involving forms of disbelief-denial, regret, shame, confusion, overwhelm, sadness). When we embrace that whatever life offers us is here to serve us – magical things can happen.
I’d love for all of us to move through fear, confusion and pain associated with loss.
Here are some quick Guidelines on working with Loss & Grief:
𝟭. “Get Rid of ‘I can’t handle it!’: the biggest block in moving through emotions is the belief that they are bigger than you are. This isn’t true as you are the one holding the space for them – so you must be bigger!
𝟮. Lean into it: don’t run, delay or deny what you feel – the more you allow yourself to feel and even invite more in – the faster it passes through you.
𝟑. Remember it’s meant to finish: kick “this is endless” thoughts aside – emotions aren’t eternal, everything changes.
𝟒. Look for ‘goodies’: we were taught a lie about “unpleasant emotions” e.g. they hurt us & have no further use. If the Universe is kind, then what you feel has a value. Look for that value. You WILL find it.
𝟓. Higher Power: studies on longevity & happiness show that people who accept there is a Higher Power, deal with adversity and regain balance much faster.You don’t have to be religious or spiritual to open your mind to the Greater Intelligence of Nature, which includes cycles of life.❤️
Feel free to share below if any of the points above resonate with you the most.
If you would like to work through loss: the course on ‘Moving through Loss into Joy and Confidence’ is available online (check workshops on this website), and if you act before 26th of March 2023, you can still join some of the sessions Live in the course.
If you would like some help with moving through challenging emotions into peace, contentment and even joy 1:1 – you can book a Discovery Call to see if I can assisst you with that.
Disclaimer: By reading this and other posts on this website, you agree that this information is shared only as a personal experience shared by the author. The information shared on this website is not designed to diagnose or treat mental or physical disorders or conditions.
Whenever we intend anything, we gather, direct and send energy to organise itself into what we want.
A blessing is one of the most powerful ways to intend & manifest: e.g. we lovingly bless somebody with a positive intention to have more love, luck, health. This is why people say: “Wish me luck!”, “Wish me well!” when they need extra support.
What might be possibly new to some people is that you can bless yourselfwith the same effects as when blessing others. I practice self-blessing or loving intentional well-wishing often for self-healing, manifesting and raising my vibes and mood. If you first bless you, then whatever good you intend for others will have a stronger effect because you will be vibrating at a higher frequency (see my preffered formula for self-blessing below).
Science: to date at least 66 papers have been published on the Maharishi effect* – the observable positive effects of “loving kindness and wellness wishing” meditation on larger groups of people and environment; such as reduced violence, sickness and accidents as well as reduction of casualties in war zones. Additionally, the research done on collective prayer also proves that we each hold this incredible Power of manifesting our loving intentions.
Other benefits of consistent self-blessing:
– tap into & grow your natural positive power;
– deeper connection with your Divine Nature or Higher Self;
– manifesting what you desire;
– experience positive shifts in how you feel and in your life;
– feel more confident about what you can do in the world;
– a greater meaning and importance of your life;
– increase inner confidence
Below is an example of a Self-Blessing you can repeat once or a few times, it is best done with your eyes closed and many of my clients feel stronger effects when imagining a golden or other pleasant colour light shower them as they say the words. (You can imagine golden sparkles – a bit like a magic wond blessing.)
I bless you with Love and Light as you read these words
You can add other words to your blessing, such as: success, happiness, confidence, manifesting powers.
*References to 66 published papers discussing the positive effects of individuals and groups practicitng meditation https://anantidotetoviolence.org/transcendental-meditation/research-on-the-maharishi-effect/
In the last 3 years I have seen more families, friends and communities turn away from each other because they chose opposing points of view.
I also see a new way that’s emerging for all of us, where we can remain true to who we are and still be connected with people who don’t share our opinions.
How can we do this?
What helps is acknowledging that a conscious biological life is running through ALL of us. E.g. we all belong to one massive biologically interconnected organism called humanity, and also to all life forms on this planet through the intricate intelligent microbiology (fungi global network connects all of life). It is how it is beyond our control or individual opinions. It connects us whether we consciously accept it or not. It is deeper and more unifying than any differences we might focus on in our minds.
We can also acknowledge another perspective: beyond life expressing itself as forms, there is a deep harmonious presence that is endless and infinite – in scientific lingo we can call it the “Universal Field”, “Quantum Intelligence Field”, more commonly the Source, God, Great Spirit. Try as you may to deny this, your consciousness and all atoms in your body are a part of ONE field with everybody else! We all affect each other and at that level of consciousness, we actually cooperate with each other, because we are also one ‘consciousness organism’.
This greater spiritual awareness helps to understand that any opinion you hold about another person or event – can only be partially accurate, because there is a Bigger Picture of how it fits in within the Greater evolution and harmony of the Universe beyond a particular time and local space.
That does not mean that you will cease to form opinions: you will have a chance to form an informed perspective each day as new data widen your awareness, based on which you will hold ‘an opinion’. Your awareness will always inform your actions. You can also share your viewpoints with others so they get a chance to see the world “through your eyes” to widen their view – if they choose to. The difference is that you will no longer feel ‘attacked personally’, as your identity is not under any threat, because you yourself no longer think of yourself as a bunch of viewpoints. You now know they are a part of what you see at the time and not who you are. :)
The conflict and pain only arise if you feel so identified with a particular perspective, you feel threatened when it is time to widen it. As in it may feel to you like YOU – your whole being – is being destroyed when your opinion needs to change into a new one.
A lot of harm has been done by people to other people and the Earth from a desire to ‘keep’ one’s opinions unchanged. Ideological wars is a prime example. My ‘opinion’ ;) is that many outdated scientific theories have been kept much longer than needed – sometimes to humanity’s detriment. Think of Galileo Galilei who was under a house arrest for the last 8 years of his life because he perceived that the Earth rotated around the sun and people in power held onto an opinion that it was the other way around!
The solution is to open your mind to the fact that you cannot possibly know 100% truth, therefore at best you can just hold a temporary opinion until more information arrives and you are free to update it! By focusing on updating rather than identifying with what you perceive and currently think, you get several ‘bonus points’:
your mind stays more flexible and you are more able to form your own opinions, independent from a sense of indentity and belonging to any one opinionated group of people;
you stay more cheerful and relaxed when other people are very protective of what they believe, e.g. shout or try to enforce them – you simplyu allow them to have a temporary opinion that ‘opinions matter more than life’;
you are not forced to seek belonging through shared mental outlooks, you know you are securely connected with humanity beyond individual or collective points of view.
you feel less threat, fear or anger when your opinion doesn’t match with somebody else, you are safe as you no longer view yourself as something that can be attacked or destroyed mentally.
We can then be present and relate from a deeper truth with all beings – whatever mental stance they may take.
The same principle works if you wish to connect and feel a deeper belonging not only with humans but with the animal kingdom: when you are more curious about widening your persepctive and learning from life rather than ‘knowing it all’, you think less, your mind quietens, your brain enters into a more widely persceptive and peaceful Alpha frequency. This is where animals relax their perspective of vigilance and fear as they pick up on your peacefulness and start to hold a different ‘opinion’ about you :)
You can stop fighting to belong: you are never alone, and you are always in unity with all.
What do you do when you feel drawn to something, make your move, then suddenly some barriers pop up in your way? Do you take it as 𝐚 ‘𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩’ 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐔𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞 or do you push 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐬?
𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞: I centre into my Inner Being, sit very quietly, tune into the ‘option in question’ & check whether it moves & uplifts me or not.
If the choice in question doesn’t lift me, & even if my mind says “it makes so much sense, let’s do it!” – I don’t go ahead.
If the choice feels elevating & exciting, yet I might notice fear or doubt – I know this is my shadow talking, so I work through the resistance, and say ‘Yes!’ to my soul’s excitement.
𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐬 from the Universe?
You are a part of life too, so you “communicate with the Universe” through signs… AND
sometimes what “comes up” is not life telling you to turn back, it can be your manifested resistance to getting more from life.
e.g. some of my clients had colds & flu, devices break down, clocks stopping just before Deep Sessions with me – those were often the most Impactful sessions with massive changes for people.
Ultimately, whatever lifts your spirit, feels exciting & interesting to you is what will bring you joy, learning, satisfaction.
When we expand to receive more, fear-excitment is inevitable. However, it takes practice (or some very intense circumstance) for most people to learn the difference between “This is a SOLID NO’ which sometimes will feel like heaviness, tightness or even terror, and when it is an old pattern that needs to shift out of fear and into love.
Life comes in through us and is experienced on the inside, so It’s worth spending time getting to know how YOU experience your ‘Yes’, ‘No’ and ‘Maybe’
𝐓𝐨 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐆𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 ‘𝐘𝐞𝐬’ 𝓪𝓷𝓭 ‘𝐍𝐨’, 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞’𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐬, 𝐢𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡: 𝐔𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝓸𝓻 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬, 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐣𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 & 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝓪𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓲𝓽. “𝐑𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐟: 𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐏𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 & 𝐋𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐈𝐭” 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐩 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝟐𝟓𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐂𝐨. 𝐖𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐨𝐰, will focus on deepening these abilities + more. This is a 3-point Healing and Initiation process to: 𝐫𝐞-calibrate a 𝐃𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐫 awareness of 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐆𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐟; 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐇𝐢𝐠𝐡 𝐯𝐢𝐛𝐞𝐬 even when faced with pressure/conflict/other people’s agenda; make 𝐄𝐚𝐬𝐲 𝐃𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 from your Greater self!
P.S. Feel like going even Deeper & making the Biggest Changes for Yourself? Feel free to book a Discovery Session to chat about my Deepest Dive one-to-one programme to date and what it can do for you HERE.
Shame is one the most uncomfortable and suffering-inducing emotions we can have. Much intrigue, fear, sadness and maliciousness can stem from unresolved shame.
It can show up in many ways: shyness, insecurity, instability, low self-esteem, feeling bad/wrong, not good enough, upset, isolated, paranoid, blaming, confrontational or scared of conflict, afraid of connection or commitment (to life, yourself or other people).
Also, shame can be seen as… innocence…
It’s that feeling of ‘I am so vulnerable, so small in this Big World’… so uncertain of myself, child-like shy, limited and innocently unaware of All I AM…
When we tap into this space of Innocence within shame… we start to unite these polarised but forever connected energies into a neutral state of Just Being… Neither good or bad, right or wrong…
Being stuck on just one possibility of being with shame, we can’t quite move past it and onto the next stage.
Here are 5 Healing Steps to take to start shifting your relationship with shame:
1. Name it – shame can be one of the trickiest emotions to detect. We often hide it under sadness, anger and frustration, especially at others and life circumstances.You could start naming it neutrally: “I feel shame right now.”
2. Acknowledge Normalcy: if we make being ashamed wrong, we shame ourselves and make it bigger! So instead – look around and you’ll see that everybody is ashamed of something now and again. You are normal & aren’t weak for feeling this way!
3. Expose it: shame feeds off secrecy – once it’s in the open, it diminishes its grip on you. Write it with kindness in your journal, practice courage by sharing with a compassionate person you trust.
4. Stop the Self-Blame Thrower: we believe that if we stop shaming & berating ourselves, we won’t change. However, research and common sense show that it doesn’t work. We continue feeling bad and behaving in the same way. Hurt never heals, only Love does. Whenever you notice being judgy to self, use a higher path: “I forgive & accept myself for being imperfect. I open to seeing Truth and Love in Who I am.”
5. Seek Help: By working with gifted healers and heartful professionals, I moved much faster on my own journey with shame. These healing experiences all helped me uncover my individual lessons around self-loathing, self-dislike and self-judgement, allowing me to elevate into much deeper self-love and appreciation.
Looking forward to seeing you then! Please RSVP “Going” or “Maybe” on fb, so Facebook reminds you when we go Live and when the Replay is ready!
P.S. Feel like going Deeper & making Bigger Changes for Yourself? In my “Love Being You” programme, we work a lot with shame where I bring people through individual journeys on emotional mastery and gaining your Great Life Power from shame. Feel free to book a Discovery Session to chat about my Deepest Dive one-to-one programme to date and what it can do for you HERE.
